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Day 8 JOY
Herman rises early Sunday morning, seeking revenge. He gets the newspaper, brews coffee and fries bacon. Myrtle will get so wrapped up in the JOY of a leisurely morning, she won’t notice Herman tackling day 8 of decluttering. Just wait until she discovers all three drawers of her sock collection are missing.
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Day 7 DECORATION
Herman: Where’s the stuff I had on my nightstand? Myrtle: Remember? Decluttering? Keeping only essentials? H: I only get to keep my CPAP? How about I declutter your nightstand? M: My things are DECORATIONS. H: Your decorations are essential. Mine aren’t? M: Unmatched socks, old newspapers, and used tissues do not enhance our décor.
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Day 6 PROTEST
Myrtle PROTESTs. A woman can never have too many shoes. She’s not going to search for old shoes piled up in her closet and stashed under her bed. Herman has only four pairs. Myrtle throws away three pairs with holes in their soles. How many shoes does Herman have now?
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Day 5 FLURRY
There’s a flurry of activity going on by the linen closet. Sorting out the kitchen towels would be easy enough if they put away in the proper place. Myrtle sighs. Herman has been doing the laundry. He will never learn the difference between a kitchen towel and a bath rug.
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Day 4 CANDY
Before organizing pots and pans, Myrtle read warnings about scratched Teflon pans. They should be dead by now, considering the condition of theirs. She tossed all those murderous pans, keeping one dainty glass pan, perfect for a CANDY jar. It will be a pleasant break from cooking until Amazon delivers.
Herman and Myrtle 